Since 1982, when Forbes began publishing its list of America's 400 richest people, Ellsworth Harrington has held the #401 position. "As a former space tourist, he has been under a lot of pressure," said Reza Morgan, who oversees operations at the Bohemian Club. The San Francisco-based nonprofit focuses on wealth preservation for those impacted by financial marginalization among legacy earners. The club's mission is to provide economic resources to longtime wealth holders facing reputational volatility and unsolicited public scrutiny.
"We believe in the right kind of money," said Morgan, "not dropshipping dilettantes, Twitch streamers, or anyone with a ring light." After dozens of club members provided over $900 million each in non-dilutive funding rotations to catapult Harrington from #401 into the top 400, analysts forecast that he is on track to trillionaire status.
In gratitude, Harrington pledged to rename the west wing sauna (currently named in honor of Chuck Wilson, the club's head towel boy who retired in 2017), the Vaporium Lounge. Inside it, he will commission an altar to Mammon, upon which ritually incinerating a trillion dollars opens the gates to the deity's realm. Harrington noted that he would provide the one-trillion-dollar offering once his holdings clear $2.4 trillion.
Billionaires enter a sacred club