Trump Ties the Unbandaged Hands of Sign Language Interpreters
Do sign language professionals have bigger hands than the president?
WASHINGTON, D.C. - According to a lawsuit filed by the National Association of the Deaf, the Justice Department has argued that providing sign language interpretation "would severely intrude on President Trump's prerogative to control the macho image he so desperately wants to present to the public." District Judge Amir Ali issued an order last month requiring the White House to provide transparency on the matter, but as always, the Trump administration has left everyone wringing their hands.
An insider close to the President stated, "The claim some are making that this is about optics is not true. The President simply doesn't like people who move their hands that way because it draws attention to his own, which are swollen from all the hard work he is doing backhanding democracy. Additionally, people have been noticing that the President is suffering from hearing loss; some supporters have gone so far as to suggest that the interpreters are now there because Trump doesn't even know what he himself is saying."
While the Justice Department has declined further comment, it did post a response on social media using interpretive-dance emojis. As expected, no one understood the message.
Gallaudet University student ponders blinking in Morse code to communicate Trump's message.